Shake harder, boy
If you’re reading this, and you’ve ever been in a situation where you’re at a convenience store, or waiting in a bank lobby with more than one ATM, or basically in any situation where there are multiple checkouts but no clear line-forming infrastructure, and you’ve simply walked over to the checkout with the shortest “line” (ie, the one where a single person is being helped), completely ignoring the group of people standing still in a linear fashion in a location that, perhaps because of the quirks of the location’s shelves, just so happens to be somewhat adjacent to another checkout, then please stop reading this blog. Take it out of your RSS feed. Delete it from your bookmarks. Unfriend my page on Facebook. I don’t want my blog associated with you.
Because here’s a newsflash: THERE’S ONE LINE!
It’s not hard. You get in line, and the next person goes to the next available register. We can build the pyramids, we can organize governments that serve millions of people, we can write symphonies, but we can’t stand in line properly?
Holy Moses in a basket, what kind of sociopolitical levels of self-unawareness are we dealing with here? Entire physics departments at our top universities must be spending CAREERS trying to develop a gauge calibrated finely enough to accurately measure the degree of jackassery in these people, and they’re failing! This is the kind of person that probably got to the store by cruising down the shoulder to bypass a traffic jam. The line-flouting, though, is the more brazen and egregious sin, because the only deterrent to this Alexander the Great of pricks is the forlorn, sunken visages of the poor plebs that he’s slapping in the face, and yet he STILL SOLDIERS ON!
Enjoy those cherry tomatoes, jerk. Don’t choke on them or anything.
Tags: i didn't do anything to deserve having to stand behind the lady buying a can of olives with a line of credit from the Bank of Angola and you didn't do anything to deserve to bypass her, were you people raised by wolves?
This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 29th, 2011 at 9:20 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.