Dangerous, Dirty, and Unfun

The Internet is a lot like Santa Claus, if Santa Claus visited you every day and left you something awesome. Today’s awesomeness: the Geocities-izer, a little dealy that will transform any website into what it would look like as a late-90s Geocities page. To give you an idea, check out its interpretation of your favorite blog. I’d be lying if I said my favorite part wasn’t the little 7-Up Spot gif. Delightful!

h/t Gorillamask

h/t nintr

This brings me back to those lazy summer days when I’d put a GI Joe in the middle of the street, sit in the driveway with a tall, cold glass of lemonade, and watch cars driving by smash them to pieces. Hours of good fun.

H/t to Gorillamask

So the blogosphere is abuzz (well, not abuzz, but I’ve seen more than three different posts in the past two weeks) with stories about the North Pacific Gyre, and the attendant environmental crisis. The interest has been spurred along by this piece in the New York Times, and this photo essay of garbage-stuffed bird carcasses. It’s really dreadful stuff.

My first reaction upon reading these posts and looking at these pictures was obviously disgust and self-loathing. That should be self-evident. My second reaction, though, was “Old news.” Why? Because I read Cracked.

I’m specifically referring to the June 6, 2009 list “6 Real Islands Way More Terrifying Than The One On ‘Lost‘” (scroll down to #2). The Pacific Gyre has been haunting my nightmares since June! Welcome to my world.

Those of you who are familiar with Cracked know about all the dick-and-fart jokes and user-submitted Photoshop parodies, but their bread and butter is the daily list, like “The 9 Most Racist Disney Characters,” “6 Insane Discoveries that Science Can’t Explain,” and “7 Secrets Only Two Living People Know (For Some Reason).” If you’re not familiar with Cracked, get familiar! I’m willing to say that I learn more from reading a week’s worth of Cracked than I did in college. Sorry, Mom.

I use Google Analytics to track various aspects of my site’s traffic. One of the things that Google can tell me is which search terms are bringing people to Dangerous, Dirty, and Unfun. Would you like to know the most common term that brings people to DD&U from a Google search?

OMGBSE.

That’s right. OMGBSE.

I was wicked confused when I saw this, until I realized that I used the abbreviation “OMGBSE” in this Gossip Girl recap. But why were people typing in “OMGBSE”?

Because no one knew what it meant! Another top search term was “what does omgbse mean.” So, as a service not only to my precious readers, but to the unwashed Internet masses, here you go: OMGBSE means “Oh my God, best sleepover ever.” A Constance cretin uttered it when B invited those high school girls up to her apartment because she was dissatisfied with how Jenny was running C-B. So, there you go.